Sunday, 6 July 2014


Seems like plans are being put in place and the FH might be coming home this week - but I think family privacy has just gone right out of the window and our front door might as well be replaced with a revolving door.  We are looking forward to care packages involving visits three or four times a day, physios, OT, heart failure nurses and oxygen teams.......

Don't get me wrong - it will be worth it to have him home, but blimey, it feels like it will be like living in public.  Any carers who have any tips to cope with this sort of "exposure", I am open to hearing them, as we have been quite a private family group over the last few years!

Much love to you all - sorry I haven't updated properly, but have to rest too.  Thanks for the prayers xxx


Sarah Head said...

My mother is permanently bedridden with a care package involving two carers four times a day. They don't ring the doorbell but enter by the front door with a cheery hello. My parents live in a bungalow and they have to log in using the kitchen phone then use the bathroom and see to my mother in her bedroom. They don't visit any other rooms so there is the opportunity to have privacy. You'll be surprised how soon they become part of the family. The heart failure nurses are usually real treasures, easy to talk to and very down to earth and helpful. You may want to alert the school about what is happening so teachers and any counselling support can be on standby if the girls want to talk about anything. You may find they don't want to worry you with their concerns and may find it easier to talk to someone outside of the family who isn't emotionally involved with what is happening. I hope everything works out the best it possibly can for all of you.

Judy Y said...

Sorry I don't have any experience with what you are going through (and will be going through) but just wanted to say I'm thinking of you xx

Louise said...

My prayers and thoughts are with you. Glad to hear FH is improving. Take care of yourself and the girls Best wishes. Louise xxx

Angela said...

Make sure that the girls feel free to go up their rooms for privacy when they need space away from it all. You are a lovely hospitable family - but that does not mean they are required to sit around 'being polite to visitors'
Don't be afraid to say to the care package people "please can you make your appointment here for 10.30,not 10, as the family needs to...whatever"
The Care Packages are, of course, primarily for the benefit of FH - but they are also there to help you, as a whole family, manage the situation. Once the caregivers know where things are, and what they need to do, let them get on with it, it is their job. Some may even regard your offers of 'help' as'interference'
I am praying you get Lovely People, who fit in well, and become friends - but that may not happen overnight.
Encourage the girls to tell you [privately!] if they feel that a carer hasn't picked up on something that FH needs, or is misinterpreting his reactions. You know and lovehim best - and he may not always be able to articulate why he is uncomfortable with what they are doing.
You're a close family,and will spot these things I am sure. Plan some special Family Activity for times when you aren't expecting Carers round.
Hoping FH is home safe and sound very son
much love xxxx

sweet blondie blue eyes said...

Pleased to hear that FH may be home this week and you have a good care package in place.

It will help a great deal with his care, and give you as a family peace of mind.

Our thoughts are with you all.

thrift deluxe said...

It was a little like having a revolving door for MIL when her husband was ill. She is a very private person so she did find it hard to deal with the constant stream of people in the home.

I think she dealt with it by looking at it as saving them from having to go out to appointments all the time. People came to them at the specified time, they didn't have to make the effort to be up and out.

She actually found (and still finds) the well wishers harder to deal with. At least with the professionals if she didn't want to chatter then it was fine. With friends and acquaintances it's not so easy to stick to the facts alone.

Best wishes to you all.

SarahElisabeth Jones said...

Morgan, I do hope that all goes well with the plans for FH to come home.

We are in a similar position as Grandma who lives with us came home from hospital at the end of February with carers and initially physios, OTs, rehab workers, district nurses and social workers. It is disruptive particularly at first. What has helped us is that as things have settled we have the same carers rather than many different people so we have been able to get to know them and they have been lovely. I do find the paper work visits objectionable-the risk assessments that happen six weeks after the care has started and take over an hour-grrr.
For us, the carers only go into certain parts of the house which does maintain a bit of privacy. I also don't feel that I have to ask the children to clean up their toys everywhere all the time.
Praying for you.

veeknits19 said...

Good to hear you are getting lots of support, and also some rest. No real advice regarding coping with lots of helpers/ visitors except that they are all used to visiting people @ home so should be friendly and professional but not disruptive to your household. Thinking of you all, Vee xx

Andrea Williams said...

Morgan, you adapt is the only word I can use, we are lucky it is back to just me caring again but we had 18 months of 3 teams coming in .....we are private people and was hard.
I am away for a few weeks and hope on my return to hear some positive news always in our prayers xx